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GameStar Mechanic Video Game Concept Feedback

GameStar Mechanic Video Game Concept Feedback

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Written by Samuel Reed
November 14, 2013

My 8th grade students have been writing video game design pitches (letters) which they are developing on Gamestar Mechanic’s website. Their game concepts were inspired from our class reading The Odyssey. We are looking for feedback for their game concepts and for their persuasive writing technique. 

Any takers contact me at sriii2000 @ Would love to share a our letters for students to get direct feedback.

Samuel Reed, III
TC – Philadelphia Writing Project
Reading, Writing and Thinking Teacher Beeber Middle School

Here is one sample letter for your review:

Gamestar Mechanic

Dear sir/madam

Hi my name is India G. I’m a 8th grader at Beeber middle school . In my reading class were working on a project where we design our own game . My game is based on the book “The Odyssey ” which is a book about Greek gods and myths . The objective of my game is to get Odysseus back home to Ithaca his Home  . I’m naming my game after the book which is the Odyssey.

My game is based on Odyssey  the book . I choose the odyssey as the theme of my game because it’s very interesting . 3 interesting facts that will make you want to play my game is that In the book Odyssey is that the book characters are gods and goddesses and it’s based on Greek mythology so when Odysseus gets into dangerous situations he uses all of these cool weapons like wind and magic ears plugs that will block out the sound of the Scylla . Another fact is that Odysseus is lost at sea and tried to get back to his home Ithaca where his family and friends live . My last interesting fact is that Once they won back from winning the Trojan war  Odysseus sailed back with his comrades so my game will be multiplayer . These facts all relate to my upcoming game “The Odyssey ” because this will all be in my game .

I think people from all different ages will love my game because I’m a 100 percent sure once they play my game they will never want to stop they will be instantly addicted . Also everyone will want to play my game because if you had a long day at work or long day at school this game will be a good stress – reliever  . Lastly you will want to play my game because if you are having a bad day this game will turn your frown upside down .

To get more people to want to play my game I will let them design their own avatars and they will be able to pick their favorite characters like spongebob.  To endorse my product I will get people from all different ages even celebrities so people don’t think they have to be a serious gamer to play my game .

Lastly if you put my game on your website you will not regret it . It will attract more people because people from all different ages can play . Also it will get more people online because it multiplayer . Lastly everyone will want to come to your website because “The Odyssey ” will be different from every other game .


I. G.